Hooking up with an ex

Maybe he broke your heart last semester. Maybe you broke up with him before spring break. Maybe he was the first guy you dated at school and it just fizzled out. Regardless of the way he became your ex, sometimes we’re drawn back to the familiar. You’ve hooked up with your ex-boyfriend. Now what?
Check out these tips on how to move on from this (potential) mishap:
• Talk to him about it – He was your guy at one time. You shared a lot. Have a conversation with him about what happened. But don’t expect too much – men typically aren’t crazy about discussing their feelings. Ask a few, open-ended questions and then listen. You’ll know if this was a one-time thing or he’s open for it to happen again.

• Don’t talk to everyone else about it – Your BFFs are great. They’re your sounding board and your shoulder to cry on, but this situation is kind of sensitive. Feel free to confess to your closest girlfriend, but don’t make what happened public knowledge. If it’s something your ex wouldn’t want everyone to know, respect that and keep the gossip to a minimum.

• Avoid the triggering activity/event – If you’ve decided what happened is a mistake, think about what may have caused it on your end. Were you partying at his frat house again? Did you go to the same bar he goes to every weekend? Did your best friend “accidentally” invite him out to your celebratory birthday dinner? Analyze the events that lead up to your indiscretion so you can avoid them next time.

• Consider getting back together – Here’s the bottom line…maybe you still have feelings for him. Maybe you want to remove the “ex” from the boyfriend. Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that! We all make mistakes, the key is to understanding your true feelings and discussing it with him. He may feel the same way. If not, you haven’t lost anything because it was already gone. Mend your broken heart and move on to the next one.

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