How To Date a Coworker

1. In this economy where people are being over-worked and underpaid, one of the joys of a loving, meaningful relationship is being able to vent to your partner about work frustrations (and sometimes get advice). You can vent to the person who truly understands- and help each other calmly deal with situations. Once you’ve discussed (and yelled about) an issue, talk about something else or do something else.
2. Never ever ever argue at work. In fact, stay out of each other’s way as much as possible when you have tension in the relationship. Sometimes you can’t, but be polite and eschew any immature desire to be snippy, cold, or to have a sour attitude. You don’t want anyone at work- clients or coworkers- to get involved and start gossiping. Validate that you care for the other person and that you’re not ignoring them, but be honest.
3. Don’t talk about finances…but don’t be surprised if it comes up sooner in your relationship than others. You work for the same company and most likely have a ballpark idea of how much your partner makes. But depending on education levels, experience, and time working for the company, one of you can make more than the other- which could be the female. It happens. The point is not to make it an issue.
4. Know your company’s dating policy. I once dated a coworker and our employee handbook only talked about consensual relationships between supervisors and subordinates, not two people on the same level, and required that these couples notify the company so they can be moved around to ensure that neither person has to report to their partner/superior. That doesn’t mean you can’t possibly get fired for lewd behavior or get written up for flirting inappropriately. I dated a coworker who left me little stuffed animals and cards in my desk. It was sweet and inconspicuous.
5. Keep up with productivity. I loved finding love notes in my desk at the school where I worked and dated a coworker, but liable if a kid gets hurt because we were too busy checking the other one out instead of watching them on the playground. Just the same, if you miss project deadlines or lose a sale because you’re so captivated by this person then you need to tone it down. Not to say that they won’t be a distraction and you won’t find an excuse to hang by their desk or take lunch breaks at the same time- but be reasonable. Just like you shouldn’t forget about your friends to spend all your time with someone, you shouldn’t shirk your work responsibilities. Depending on what you do, you have people who need you- families, children, patients, clients, etc. Balance it!
6. Don’t take work problems personally and don’t get involved. Someone is mad at your partner at work and it has nothing to do with you or a project you’re working on? Then stay out of it. You can privately be their moral support, but don’t give people a reason to believe you’re getting extra perks on the side from a coworker. No good has ever come from that.

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterPin on Pinterest