How to dress for the walk of shame

It’s Friday afternoon and your gaze drifts to the clock. You’re not thinking about the Ming Dynasty or the teacher’s tupee. Instead, your brain is mentally sifting through every piece of your wardrobe, planning out the details of tonight’s ensemble.

Will he be there? The really attractive guy in the 3rd row? You have to look good. You’re going to party like it’s the end of the world-good.

You’re thinking three-inch stilettos, little black dress, hairspray, jewelry, and miles of make up. Mascara, literally….everywhere. At least that’s what happens the next day, when you wake up next to third-row. Stilettos broken, phone, wallet, and dignity conspicuously absent.

How do you go all out and still plan for the morning after disaster? A few small tricks will make all the difference. Number one, always carry a tiny tube of concealer. It will save your life when the mascara has run everywhere and you look like Dracula. Purse-purfume and tic tacs are a close second in romance-rescue.

Likewise, if you wear heels, bring a small pair of flip-flops in your bag. There will come a point when you will need them; namely, the walk back to your apartment at 9AM. No bag to hold them? Get one.

Third, we all love jewelry and it serves a good purpose. But don’t put on anything that’s too much work to wear, like necklaces or earings that constantly jingle or get tanlged in your hair. What happens when you try to make out with someone but they can’t find your face through the tangle? Or back at his place, you wake all seven of his housemates by sneezing. That’ll make a great impression.

Last of all, remember that if you feel uncomfortable, you look uncomfortable. Only put on what you can stand to be seen in over the next 24 hours. ‘Pulling it off’ no matter what ‘it’ is, simply boils down to confidence. If you don’t have it, don’t wear it.

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