Breaking up with someone

Sarah Reynolds is a freelance writer residing in Alabama. She received her
BA in Communications at the University of South Alabama where she was a
member of the Phi Mu sorority. After competing in Miss Alabama USA, she
decided to continue to chase her dreams, travel the world and document the
journey.

You’ve been dating this guy for several months now and he has all of a sudden decided to call it quits. He says it’s because the relationship is moving too quickly and it’s not what he wants right now, but he cares about you deeply.

Umm what?

You’re thinking to yourself that if he cared deeply about you, he would care about how he is ripping your heart out. Or see that you feel the same way and that you are SO marriage potential.

Pause. Ladies, I’m speaking to you. Do not chase after a guy that is wanting to call it quits on your relationship. No matter what he says is the real issue, it doesn’t matter. Guys do not like being chased and you begging for him to come back to you is making you seem desperate in his eyes (and everyone else’s). If you give the “I can’t live without you” threat and “I’ll do anything, baby, anything” you are just affirming his decision to end the relationship.

Do NOT throw the word “marriage” out there while he is trying to bail. Talk about a dead scare-away. No one wants to marry a crazy and marriages are not the solution to a problem.

He’ll stop being nice and responding to your texts because you have taken it too far. Quit texting. Quit calling. Do not be mopey for weeks pondering the relationship over and over in your head wondering what you did wrong. Don’t stalk his Facebook and Twitter trying to see where he was and who he was with. This will only make you even crazier than you already are.

Instead, mope around for a few days, eat some ice cream and have a sleepover with your bestie. Delete him on social media, or at least block him until you can look at his page without having a mental breakdown.  Make a plan to better yourself like, work out daily, eat healthier, and take school more seriously. Focus on yourself and not the failed relationship. After you’re feeling better mentally, make a list of qualities of what you want out of a healthy relationship and what you can contribute to it.

Then, get dressed up and have a night out with your girlfriends. Nothing cures a broken heart like laughter. I bet you’ll even meet a few new men you can test your new quality list on.

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